Of course- I hadn't called him my 'daddy' since I was a little girl. But somehow, since he died, that term seems to ring in my head- over and over and over. Because he was, in fact, my daddy. He was not a sentimental man, in fact he was kind of rough or abrasive, very firm and strict, after all- he was a Marine. He had no time for any non-sense. That is until he got just a bit older and we (my two much much older than me siblings and myself) began to produce grandbabies. The grandbabies made him softer. And the more we had, the softer he seemed to get. I never would have guessed him to be a 'baby lover', but as far as his grandbabies were concerned- he sure was.
Today is his birthday- and I miss him. And I so wish that he wouldn't have had to leave when he did- it's been almost 8 years now. But I do trust God's plan- that is not the point or the direction here. It's just that today is his birthday- and I miss him. That's all. And the three little people in my life miss him too. Now, they don't even know that they miss him. How could they- they only really know 'of' him. But I know that they miss him, because I did know him, and they are really missing out by not having him in their life. Allyson was only 13 months old when he died- so she knew him and loved him, but Ohhhh, how he loved her! After he died, it was so hard to even think about having another child- because I knew that he would never get to be their grandpa on this earth. But Emily talks about him like she 'knows' him. I imagine he got to snuggle her in heaven before sending her down. And Sam- strange as it seems as he is brilliantly blonde and brown eyed- really does seem to resemble him.There are times when he smiles a small crooked smile that I almost wonder that Dad is not in the room with us- right then and there. Not to mention that he is so super duper mischevious, that it makes me think how much my dad would have found enjoyment in this little man. Samuel Ethan Dale- Dale was my dad's name. I think that is nice.
As I mentioned before- he so loved this little girl. I mean 'absolutely lit up when she came around, saved his cookies from his trays in the hospital for her, made goofy duck noises to see her giggle' kind of love. And the feeling was mutual. I wish he could still be here to see her grow. Thanks to this little one, there is a lipgloss kiss imprint on his headstone that won't wash off (placed there when she was four years old).
And then there is Emily. I just wish he could have got to experience Emily and her emilyness.
So that's that, today is my dad's birthday. And we miss him.