Failing my Family Friday (on Saturday)

I'm either making my own wine...........or allowing food to rot in my van.

I personally purchased shoes for Emily that I'm not even sure a stripper would wear.  (She LOVES them, for the record, which I knew she would)

That plant has more umph than I do.  It hasn't been watered in like a month and it is still kind of hanging in there. (after typing this, I did in fact throw some H2O on the poor thing.  It's probably wrong to wish it would just die???)

I'm not a fan of bamboo.  And yet I have one (thriving I might add) in my dining room.  Strange.

And would you look at all of the beautiful handmade items we display in there as well???  Gorgeous.

Yeah.  All three of them on the computer.  I don't even know what they were doing.  Probably ordering a bunch of crap with Dan's credit card.  Wow- look at the dust on those stairs.

Our overgrown beast asleep on Sam's pillow (don't worry, I washed all the bedding.  even though I didn't feel like it)

My poor, poor zuchini that so wants to be turned into something wonderful.  And my cookbook that had the pages 'glued' together from prior baking frenzies.  I put them together so they might bake some bread or something.  So far no luck.

Me bed.  Buried under every towel we own. Clean towels, for the record.  I like to consider it my way of cleaning out the linen closet.

Or just avoiding washing towels for like way too long.

My closet, featuring my laundry situation. (disclaimer:  I did manage to get all of MY laundry washed yesterday.  And Dan got all those towels folded.........thank you Dan.  Next up, kids clothes.)

Random things like these lego doogies are scattered all.over.my.house.  I'm starting to consider them art.

Again?

Looks like my trees are completely ganging up on me. And the backyard just got a lot more sun.

Dan wasn't nearly as thrilled as I thought he would be.  After all, don't men live for a reason to run around the yard with running chainsaws?  Sheesh, there just is no making him happy.  Whatever, as long as he has that mess cleaned up by the weekend it is all good.

S..............O......................S

KIDS ACTING LIKE MANIACS stop

UNCONTROLLED SCREAMING AND FIGHTING stop

CAN NOT TAKE MUCH MORE stop

SEND REINFORCEMENTS stop

QUICK stop

Oh dear........

I am in a mood.

I feel like learning a new skill, starting a bakery, canning food and redecorating our house.........including but not limited to the girls room, repainting our living areas and tiling the backsplash in my kitchen.  Also- clean the deck and have the stinking chimney painted.

I even made asked one of the office girls hunt down a paint color name while at the orthodontist yesterday..........what can I say, I simply loved the color of their bathroom. Brown Paper Bag, in case you were wondering.

If I did anything productive with this urge, it would be one thing.  But instead I just think, plan and lament about them...........and shop online.

Which is how I found this....................

This may quite possibly be the most beautiful tile backsplash material I have ever stumbled upon in my life.  It is dainty, kind of victorian, and probably not the best medium for a first time tiler.  Not to mention, this little number is on the pricey side.  But Dan is loaded, so it's all good.

But I am in love, and how are you going to argue with that.

Funkylishisness, Funky Fresh, Funkyfied

I have been having me a funk.  I spent two hours (count them............two) crying last night because, get this, Dan and I are not going to have any more babies probably.  My eyes were puffy this morning from crying so hard.  Sincerely sobbing, from my heart.  It was sad. I was sad.

Today.  Today I am crying because I don't want to work really, but I kind of like it, but I don't want to work a lot, any more than what I do now really, so I need to be fine to be just the office girl but then my coworker gets all the glory and the attention- which she should since she actually shows up for work and I don't really all that often but sometimes if I feel like it- so she gets new titles and such and I'm just stupid old Mynde who really knows the show but doesn't have time to be all showy about it.  Sheesh.  Tears streaming........how pathetic.

And because Sam wanted milk, and Ally gave him water and Dan got all yelly.

Somewhere in the middle of the night my monthly 'gift' came which is like a week early and I only know that because I am on THE PILL so because they are still orange I am still in the clear..............or at least I should be but apparently I'm not.

I'm blaming all of this crazy emotion eruption on the full moon.  It always makes me squirly.

So even though I made dinner tonight, a real nice homecooked meal which we technically had to eat at 4:30 which is wayyyyy to early for dinner, we went out for a pizza at 9:30 at night because we were out getting the kids from vacation bible school.  And the particular Pizza King we ate at had a Juke Box.  And upon further inspection, it appeared that it hadn't been updated since the early 90's.  Which to my kids is bad.  But to their full moon, week early period, no more baby havin, phone girl momma it was just what the doctor ordered.

$2 later I was singing my soul out to Toni Braxton, Reba McIntire, Lori Morgan and Wynonna Judd.  I even scored a little Boys to Men (ABC a BBD. The east coast family).  It was bad karaoke on a good night without a microphone or an audience.  And I have come to the conclusion that music heals the soul, I love Pizza King with the early 90's juke box, and I need to find a great place to since some karaoke- because my singing skillz were completely wasted on my family who cared more about who had the stupid shaker of cheese and whether or not there were onions on the pizza.

And to think, I didn't even know that I was missing karaoke in my life.  Humph.

I am off to find my case of tapes and a player.  I need to brush up on my lyrics.

Dear Miss Manners,

Yesterday afternoon, Dan and I took the kids bowling.  I was craving some great family time and this seemed like just the ticket.  The second ticket as the first which was family roller skating was not possible as every single roller rink the city is closed on Sunday, what's up with that?  Any who.

We arrive at the alley, pick out 13 pairs of shoes for each person hoping to make the right fit somewhere, and we're off to our lane.  Which has people bowling on each side of it.  Crap.  Trying to keep my kids in order on whose bowling when is challenge enough, but throw in 'bowling ettiquette' and how to wait your turn and I was sweating it dude.

See, bowling might not be the redneck sport we have all picked it out to be.  There are actually 'rules' that one must follow.  Like you don't walk down the concession stand in front of the bowling lanes, you don't slap other teams behinds for fabulous scores, and pouring yourself a beer out of a strangers pitcher is considered rude.  Got it.

So we begin our game and all is well.  My children are focused, encouraging, happy and respectfully waiting their turn on the lane. With the exception of Sam getting confused on which lane to actually throw his ball down, all was running swimmingly.

So much so that I even bowled this time.  I'm typically the 'bowling wrangler'.  I hoist balls, run back and forth to the bathroom, drag that silly metal helper ball thing over and back, etc.  But this time, I was a participant.  And in all of our ball running, I failed to grab one for myself.  But heck, with other people on the lane next to us, our little corral was dang near full, and there were like 3 12lb balls in there already.  I prefer the 6pounder, but the finger holes are so dag gone little.

So anyway, my turn comes and I grab whatever 12lb ball is there.  Next ball, grab another and off we go.

Around the 5 or 6 frame, the kid (and I am not joking- he was like 13) informs me that the yellow ball is in fact his and this one (points to a green one) is mine.  I must have gotten confused as they all had a giant EXPO BOWL stamped on them and I was under the assumption that they all belonged to the alley.

It's not like I was asking to borrow his shoes each time.  Sheesh.  So apparently there is actual ettiquette to bowling, and I need to brush up on it.  Really though, was I completely out of line?????  Seriously.

Long story longer, I made the mistake of buying a drink around the finish of our first game.  One great big drink that we could share.  But since we had JUST finished dinner before coming, that shouldn't be an issue.

Except all game progress shut down because now all three kids were fighting and picking over who had the drink.  Can't bowl anymore, need to watch who takes how many drinks.  Sam officially quit and removed his shoes..........he just spent the last half of our time holding the drink and biting the straw and screaming over who was taking a drink.

Good times.

Hope it is a super fabulous week.............the last one of July you know.

I was going to be a really great mom, but then I had kids

Remember when you got pregnant with your first little love muffin child and your mind (and heart) were full of the perfect way to raise them?

How to wash their clothes, disinfect their toys, the best way to feed them----you know, fresh nutritious meals and snacks packed with vitamins and minerals.  You were going to be the best mom ever. (and when I typed ever I said evah)

And if you never progressed past one child- then you may have just held on to some of those guidelines.  But somewhere between two and three kids, most of mine flew out the window.  So instead of declaring 'no soda, no exceptions' and progressing to 'no soda except on special occassions'.....we are now limited to one soda a day..............and it's fine with me if you drink it with breakfast.  Whatevah.  Candy- you can have it as long as you for.the.love.of.all.things.good.and.holy throw the wrappers away.  Dinner- I made it, you eat it.  You don't eat it you might be hungry but I am no longer going to try and wrangle you into eating 1-2 bites of anything.  Here's your plate- eat. don't eat. Eh.  Oh- and while on the topics of food- hot dogs technically do count as a meal now, but when pregnant I just KNEW I would never feed that to my child.

A few rules stick- look both ways before crossing the street, use good manners, love God.  Um, I'm thinking, thinking, thinking..............................yeah that might be it. 

I just don't have the strength, time or attention span to officially enforce much else.  And really, I'm on the fence about the good manners part- that takes a lot of energy to teach.

I'm off to make lunch.  I'm thinking oatmeal and a beer- but we'll see.

Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Before:

After:

Yes- I had to wipe away tears as I watched all of his soft, sun bleached hair fall to the floor.  But he wanted to be like Nick- so there you have it.

Sam and his super fit powers

Because I am a good mother, I broke out my camera to document Sam's newest fit throwing abilities.  It's just good parenting people- learn from me.

This is new, so I find it facinating.  He shrieks.  Like a loud quick yell- over and over and over.

And he yells words and demands, as if THAT is going to work.

This particular fit was because he wanted to get on ebay with me and look at 'talking cars' and I couldn't do it right.that.minute.

Oh he was mad.  M A D

And then he slapped me.

And here he is in time out.  But he was tired of my camera, I guess.

Down Sized

I can only imagine what it feels like to find out your job has been 'eliminated' from a company.

Until today.

After all, that company hired me to do a job.  And have provided me with a source of existence and purpose for what feels like my entire life.  I have basically given up the majority of myself and my time for almost 11 years, and now I am just no longer needed.

Strange.

"Due to changes in our operations, your services will no longer be required starting Fall of 2011.  We are restructuring and downsizing, and your position will technically no longer be needed.  Because of your generous dedication to our well being and growth, we felt it necessary, and important, to give you a full years notice.  However, the next year will be a very busy transition time in which your skills will be much utilized and appreciated.  You have been a large contributor to our success, and we are grateful to have had you as part of our organization.  Thank you for your service.  Sincerely- your children".

I'm not sure why it is striking me so hard, but the thought of Emily starting FULL DAY 1st grade in a few weeks just sucks the air right out of my lungs.  And then, to know that Sam will begin kindergarten next Fall- uhg.  All those times when I had a baby strapped to my breast and toddlers swinging from the light fixtures and I would joke about them all being in school........... I had no idea that it would actually happen.  It seemed so far away.  But having children means your time gets sucked into a warp machine, apparently, and years are like minutes and BAM!  Your youngins' are gone and you are jobless and no longer needed except for dentist appointments and dinner preparation.  And then I will be faced with what to do with my time.  Time that I haven't had for over 10 years.  Time I'm not sure I really want back just yet.

This momming thing- very tricky.

(Post Edit:  Sam just took every shirt he owns off of it's hangar, threw it on his floor, and informed me that he is NOT going to clean it up.........EVER.............all because I won't cut the sleeves off of a long sleeved Fall shirt.  I suppose my work is not quite finished here after all. Thank you sweet Jesus, not for the fit but for the child who still needs his mom.)

Related to Royalty

That is- if you consider a close neighbor and your children's favoritest and bestest babysitter/friend in the whole universe family

And if you consider Royalty the county fair queen (which we do)

-on a side note- look at Sam, he is SMITTEN with Melissia, puddy in her hands-

And I share with you proof that she is in fact considered royalty- at least in Hancock County- because she got to have her picture taken on THE great big tractor.

Just one of the perks to being the queen in farm country I suppose.

Can I just, for a brief moment, say how devastated my heart feels that this young woman will be moving away to college in just a few short weeks?

We are so going to miss her.  But none of us quite like Sam, I'm afraid.  And right next to Sam- will be heartbroken Emily and Allyson, followed by me.  She is a delightful young woman and a blessing to our family and I wish she were still 12 and eating cookies in my kitchen while playing with my kids.  She truly is royalty.  At least to us.

That was random..........

Allow me to share with you .........

Sleeping in piggy tails makes your hair CRAZY.  (Emily made me promise I wouldn't post this on my blog, I assured her I wouldn't......)

The county fair is the highlight of our entire summer.  We've been there like everyday this week.  We need a hobby.

Sam lives to get 'fancy beers' at the county fair.

Sam does not wear glasses- but he will look good in them should he ever have to.

My beautiful niece- who has discovered eyeliner.  (Remember when we all used to color the inside of our eyelids until they resembled dark, black slits?  That is a phase we must all go through, apparently)

We are having a yardsale this week, and the lightbright is not for sale.

We Goble's have been camping out in the living room on the 'air camashener' alot lately.  Lew is loving it.

Ally won't let me take her picture much these days- but here is her hand..... and Giblet.

Gardening 101

Believe me when I say I know the way to a happy garden.

Straight rows, lots of sun, perfectly marked signs so you know what is what, no weeds, fertilizer. Oh- I get it.

Therefore, I bring you..............

My garden.

See- there is a common misconception that you plant your items in order and in rows. Fools. I am giving the 'love' method a try.

See how the tomatoes are planted in a nice circle? It's a circle of love. They are gathered around sharing coffee and gossip- they are breeding love. And when tomatoes breed love- they produce fruit. Just sayin'.

And see that lone bell pepper over to the side. He's a beast, so we put him over all by himself. Sam picked him out, but the tomatoes were NOT happy.

In the back there- that strange gourd plant. Yeah- he's a volunteer from my sister in laws garden. But happy I might add. Growing and blooming and vining everywhere. Happy Happy Happy.

There's also a pumpkin vine and a watermelon in there somewhere. I can't remember which is which. I guess signs would have been handy. However, whichever one grows a watermelon will be the watermelon so I guess we don't really need signs now do we?

Down in the front- those are the kids beautiful flowers. I gave them shovels and the freedom to just dig holes and shove them in.

What's that you say? You see a lot of grass? Well HELLO- I can't very well get the lawn mower in there now with all those plants, now can I? Sheesh. And it's not like it's practical to sweat and work just to pull weeds- that would be crazy.

So there you have it- gardening with the best of them (that's me in case I lost you). I was going to take a picture of my neighbors straight rows, weed free, perfect garden just to show you how unhappy their non gossiping tomatoes are, but they were out on their deck and I was in my pajamas. Sorry.

And check this out.  Miss Emily planted her gourd seeds the night they painted the pots in VBS- and all three have sprouted.   What can I say- farming is in our blood.

(PS- Mom just called and said she felt it was important that I let you all know that she taught me everything I know about gardening.  So there you have it.)

A bunch of mindless dribble with a side of useless info

I am not positive, but I think I might be having a mid-life crisis.

No, I'm not leaving my family to join a University in Brazil or trading my Mini-Van for some hot sporty topless number with a stick shift.  But ohhhhh to drive a car with a stick shift for just a moment, doesn't that get my blood running.  But they don't make mini-vans with stick shifts- just automatic door closers and dvd players, apparently.  Uhg.

What I am thinking about doing is eating more carrot sticks and grilled chicken.  Crazy, I know.

See- twice in the past week friends that I graduated high school with (as in- we are the SAME age) have posted pictures on their facebook and they look so ravishingly beautiful.  One was even on vacation in a bikini.  This chick gave birth to three children- two at the same time!  She hosted twins in her belly that she can now show in public.

Their hair is pretty, their clothes are trendy, and their bodies are thin and healthy.  And mine is not.

I have been getting progressively more over weight with time.  I began my life fairly slim and made it through high school that way.  Well, I may have packed on a few pounds thanks to my job at PoFolks and a found love of buttermilk biscuits.  But still I was pretty thin.

Regardless, met Dan when I was just slightly 'thick' and have progressively just gotten 'thicker'.

As I try to at least pretend I am going to change my ways (this time)- let me share with you things I have learned about eating healthy:
Carrot Cake does not count as a vegetable- even if it has a cute icing carrot piped on the top (very tricky- I know)
Egg Salad is apparently not a salad
Eating little tiny cookies really fast does not reduce their calories
Drinks can have significant calories- especially at Starbucks
Cheeseburgers aren't healthy- even if you eat lettuce and tomato on them (which techinically are vegetables- it's like a catch 22)
Most alcoholics are thin- but booze is expensivo, so it's not the best option for me
The only real way to buckle down and loose the weight is to eat less, and move more- neither of which are fun

So I sit here kind of at a crossroads.  I've been here before, so it may just be a passing thing.  I just feel like I've got to do something to feel better.  I even considered asking the doctor for some kind of pill to make me loose weight- but then I realized that technically I haven't really tried yet.  So first I will do my part, I think. 

Anyone who has never struggled with weight probably doesn't understand.  "Just eat less dorkwad" you might be saying.  But food seems to be more to me.  And this is obviously hard- otherwise I would have lost the weight the last 46 times I said I was going to.  It's all consuming.  And it kind of sucks a lot.  And I love bread. But I am going to buckle down and try to do this thing.  Really, I think.

But we are getting ready to head over to the fairgrounds, and they have those stinkin' homemade doughnuts and milkshakes there so I'm not sure my will can be strong today.  Those are like my kryptonite man.

So here I sit- with eyes filled with tears and a grocery list packed with fresh fruits and vegetables.  I apparently have a choice to make.  And that choice is do I actually pack these crazy kids to the grocery or just hang out and fine tune my mario cart skills today- and worry about this healthy eating thing tomorrow.

On a completely different note:  I am just thankful that my Miss Emily has not a drop of self esteem issues- being as she now looks like a giant hillbilly and all.  But then again- not everyone could pull of that toothless smile like she can.

Dear School System,

Hard to believe, but just one more month until the old school bell will be ringin'.  That is, if you continue to insist that the kids return mid-August like you put on the old calendar.  I still really don't believe that, it seems so early, but what the hell.  They are starting to make me a little crazy so I'm sure we'll be ready by then.

The real reason for my note is that I wanted to tell you thanks.  With Allyson starting Middle School this year, I was taken back by the 6:45AM school bus pick up time.  Then I realized you were just messing with me.  Oh, Ha Ha He He, what a gut splitter, my sides are still hurting from laughing so hard.  What a good one, I really needed a good laugh.  See, I was really kind of worrying about how on GODS GREEN EARTH I was going to manage to drag not only myself, but my kind of tempermental 10 year old out of bed at 6am, 5 days a week, to get ready for school.  And then, when I realized that it MUST be a joke- oh gosh I have never ever laughed so hard.  Ahhhhh, how super funny of you is that.  What a crack up you are.

So really, what time will the bus be coming next month?  I'm good with 9 or 9:30, but whatever works for you.  Oh- and if we do manage to oversleep, what time does the 'overslept' bus come back around? 

Sincerely,

We LOVE our sleep around these parts Momma

Do people still say Hooptee?

My nephew called a couple of weeks ago- so very excited to tell me and Dan that he had bought a car.

Not a hotwheels or remote control, apparently time is marching along and my little baby nephew with giant chipmunk cheeks is 17 and thinks he is old enough to drive.  As if.

So last week he called and wanted to drive over and show us his new ride.

This kid was about to BURST he was so proud.  He spoke of air ride suspension, keyless entry, automatic trunk closer upper thingys, he looks at this car and sees nothing but shiny beautifulness.

I see my nephew who I am so very proud of for saving and learning and becoming a young man.

And a car that may or may not be at the end of its useful life.  I see duck tape holding together the door panels, upholstery that looks well used, and taillights that have red plastic panels taped on them.  I don't mean that in a bad way at all.............it just is what it is.  He has owned it for a month.........and has already began learning about how to fix carish items like radiators and water pumps and such.  He's also (finally) motivated to get a job and earn some money.  After all, he wants gas to drive around with.  And I might be guessing here, but I'm not sure this is the highest mile per gallon ride on the market.

When he got here, I told him that his Uncle Dan was excited to get to go for a ride.  "I BET he is" was his response.  He also mentioned that he was sure uncle dan wouldn't pass by the opportunity to ride in a Lincoln Town Car.  I was just hoping (beyond hope) that he wasn't going to make ask me to ride in it.

I ran in the house to pack up some muffins for him to take home with him (because he just happened to come on my baking marathon day last week, and I am his Aunt Mynde after all and we Aunts send baked goods home with our nephews) and when I came back out of the door, I saw this.........

I could see the wheels turning in Sam's little head.  Someday he too will purchase his first set of wheels, I think he's already laying the plans (he keeps talking about unmentionables with just two wheels.........over my DEAD body!)  Boys and their giant old battle wagon cars....just 12 years until there just might be one located in my drive way driven by my super blonde boy.  Yikes.

whhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...............

I can not begin to explain what this week has been like.  A great super week.  But man am I glad it is over.

All in just a few short days, we returned from vacation, hosted a neighborhood cookout, coordinated crafts for 30+ kids every night at vacation bible school, prepared 2 fine art projects for the 4H entry, prepared 2 baked items for the mini-4H entry, trapesed back and forth to the fairgrounds like 300 times (well- just 3, but it felt like 300) to submit said items, Allyson had a sleepover (me=pushover), Dan spent the day at a clinic with metal stuck in his eye, we finally were able to have Uncle Buddy's memorial  and two guinea pigs were shown at the fair (4th trip by the way to the fabulous fairgrounds).

Which is why I basically produced myself in the office one day this week and said sorry, but apparently I am like on week two of vacation and I totally can't commit to being here with any frequency this week- buh bye.

Every day has had non-stop stuff to do- morning until night.

So today to wake up and glance at the old calendar and see,   what?   what is that?????  nothing?  Could it be possible?  There is NOTHING on the calendar for today.

Well blow me down.

Looks like I might get to that mountain of dishes in the kitchen and endless piles of laundry after all.

Pictures from the fair.....................(sorry Ally- I didn't get a picture of you with your painting.........but it really was beautiful and I'll make it up I promise)

A perfect day for rain

Today we will drive to a little cemetery on the side of a county highwayish type road and provide a final resting place for Dan's uncle.  Gerald Leroy Goble.

It seems so odd.  He has now been 'missing' for 7 years.  So we have already had that time to grow accustomed to his absence in our lives.  And when his body was discovered this past spring, the well of emotions came bubbling back to the top and flowed for weeks.  But forensic people had to do their thing, so we had to wait for them to finish with him.

And last week they were, and they sent Buddy home.  What was left of his earthly body has been cremated and today we will gather together at his grave and properly lay him to rest.

I can not begin to tell you how many prayers I have offered to our Lord about Buddy.  Somewhere deep in my soul, I knew he had died.  But I wanted the peace that I thought would come in knowing where his body was.  And there is a comfort in having found him, and I am thankful that the Lord gave us that gift.  But now my heart is just heavy and full with wonder of what happened to him.  But I do know that our God is a merciful God, and I can't imagine he allowed Buddy to suffer.  So there is my peace. I just hope that someday the horror that fills my heart everytime I think about his poor body laying in that field for 6 years will lesson.  I hate that he had to lay there in that field.

Buddy developed schizophrenia when he blossomed into his manhood.  He spent the majority of his years on this earth wrestling with that beast.  But Buddy was full of joy, a beautiful childlike joy that made it all okay.  If you've ever spent time around someone who is mentally retarded or challenged, then you know what I mean when I say they are especially blessed.  It is like the Lord has given them the ability to only find the happy in most ever situation, just pure joy.  Buddy was a pleasure to be around, and I have deeply missed him.

Today I will hold my children's hands as we stand at a grave with a box, a tiny tiny box.  And again, I will explain to them who their Uncle Buddy was, why they either have never met him or don't remember him (allyson was 3 when he disappeared and I was pregnant with Emily), and how lucky they are to have had him in their family.

Today will not be an easy day.

Attention marketing department

Remember a year or so ago when Always came up with this crazy crazy marketing campaign about making it a happy period?????  And every, and I do mean EVERY, woman in the universe rolled their eyes and gently mumbled 'whatever' under their breath.

What on earth could you ever find 'happy' about bleeding to death every month for 40+ years of your life?  Not to mention doing so while you are on the verge of killing anyone and everyone who even acts like they even might cut you off in traffic, steal your spot in the check out line or ask you for more mashed potatoes.  And that comes only after bursting into tears at every stupid Kleenex commercial and Hallmark card for a few days prior.  Add the water weight gain, the inability to find enough to eat, and fighting the urge to eat chocolate non-stop for 4 days, and the extra laundry that is created. We'll just say NOT HAPPY.

So- mr. marketing man (because clearly a woman would have not come up with THAT campaign)- listen up.

I'm envisioning individually wrapped up pads and tampons- like you already do- only they will have 'fortunes' if you will, printed on the wrappers.  But they will not be positive happy uplifting stuff.  No.  Any other time of 'our' month, that would fly and probably be appreciated, but you would be wasting your ink on us during these few days of our lives.

Instead- you will print items that we can actually relate to.  For instance:

"In 1983 a woman was proven innocent after murdering her husband, claiming that she was suffering from PMS" note- we'll have to look this info up- I just made this up, but I'm sure it is true

"Martinis- not just for lunch anymore"

"Bite Me"

"If I have to repeat myself ONE MORE TIME I swear my head is going to explode"

"Is anyone capable of changing the toilet paper roll in this entire house except me?"

"Chocolate- the other food group"

"It is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission"

"Xanax- the breakfast of champions"

"Any living creature that can bleed for 4 days a month and not die is clearly invincible and should not be messed with"

"Welcome to your unhappy period"

Bear with me- my creative juices are flowing like molasses this morning so these are not as great as I was wanting.  So leave comments with your suggestions for other appropriate 'fortunes'.  Remember- no happy crap.

A dinosaur in our world of flowers

While on vacation, we stopped by a bakery and let the kids pick out a super fabulous decorated cookie.  And upon seeing each of our selections, I realized that one of my children is not like the others.

I always assumed my first child would be a boy.  Don't know why- I just did.

And then I had two girls.  And I 'knew' what to do (in theory) because they were girls and I'm a girl............we can relate is what I am getting at.

And then I had Sam.  I am so thankful God sent Sam.

Although, in a good way, that child will be the DEATH of me.  No joking. 

However- before Sam I didn't realize one thing in particular about boys.  They come with sound effects.  There is a constant whirrrrrr   vrooooooooom   squeeeeeeeeeeeeeel around these parts now adays............all courtesy of one small blonde boy creature.

 There is also batteries in the register vents, sand in the dryer and capri sun straws wedged in between the boards of the deck............but that's a story for another day.

There's a bench in South Haven

When my dad died, we sponsored a bench in South Haven in my dad's memory.  And every year when we go there, it is comforting to find his bench.  Sometimes it moves (they pull them in during the winter) but for the past 3 or 4 years, it has been here, in the same spot.

No matter where it is, it always seems that it is in the perfect location.  A spot that my dad would have been found sitting himself.  I thank God for that.  It is comforting.  This is the view from his bench.  Gorgeous.  It looks right down the harbour where all the boats come in and out.

And if your turn to the left, this was the view on this particular day.  The kids brought bread to feed the ducks and the seagulls.  Seagulls are demanding little creatures- just sayin.

It seems unreal that he has been gone for 9 years.  My first picture with this bench- Allyson was a year old.  And now look at us.

I would rather have my dad here with us.  But since he isn't, I like that there is a bench in his favorite place on the earth with his name on it.