I am really really really trying to focus on the fabulous- not the frumpy. And for the most part, I live in a fabulous little corner of the world. But this morning, I can not over come the desire to just whine. You don't have to read it, but I am still going to write it and with any hope, when I am done I will feel better and can embrace this day that has already begun.
I'm tired and can't sleep. I will start there. I don't know if it is the color of the paint, the fabric of my sheets, or my wayyyyyy worn out nursing night gowns that I still wear for bed (not to worry, new pj's is on my list- and has been for years, it's just one of those things, ya know?) but I can't sleep. I am waking up all night long- still very tired and able to go back to sleep but regardless, I am missing out on those hours of consecutive sleep. I wake up tired, I go to bed tired, I eat lunch tired, I AM JUST TIRED. "If you exercise you will have more energy" I have read, been told by my doctor and seen in ads- that's not working either. I'm still tired. Enough on that.
The air show is less than a month away. I can still hear one of the chairman's voice echoing in my head "All we need is someone to answer the phone and check emails". The silly part is I fell for it. Not silly because I don't love doing it, I love the air show. But it is all consuming, and personally with three children, a husband, a house, mountains of laundry, various other committees- I'm already consumed. So I suppose I should just take a deep breath, purchase lots of oven ready frozen dinners and plow through the next 26 days because I'm already waist deep in it now. Happy Air Show!
And my child is broken. No big deal, tons of kids have broken bones. Heck, my husband has had tons of broken bones. I guess I will just feel better when she gets the permanent cast on and I have a better idea of what to expect for the next 2 months (can she roller skate, ride her bike, play basketball, and is there really a water cast that will make a trip to South Haven still possible this year? What about our plans for kings island?) I just feel like I failed her, because she is now broken. At the hospital I was trying to explain to her what had happened after I saw her xrays. I was showing her on my arm how you have two long bones from your wrist to the elbow and she says "I get it, now I have 3". She is such a good kid.
And only because I declared this to be the whiny entry, I will wrap up the rest of my whinyness in one short paragraph: I have ants all over, probably because most everything we own is sticky, my husband is still recovering from surgery-like a real trooper but still, my refrigerator needs cleaned out- which is a much bigger job than I can even think about, the toys have taken over and they overwhelm me, Sam's room needs painted some shade of gorgeous blue- which me being the most indecisive person in the universe will never be able to pick out, gas is $4 per gallon, the garage is overwhelmingly crowded with (you guessed it) toys, I need to have a garage sale to eliminate said toys, there is more laundry than time in the day, I'm out of milk and-for the grand finale- today consists of a trip to the doctor, air show for 4 hours, ballet, piano, dinner and another air show committee meeting tonight. I am not going to get to sit down again until 11pm!
And now my silly blog entry goofy mambo jambo won't let me put in a picture. So sorry- no picture today. More happy thoughts tomorrow I'm sure. I must now shower and dress- Monday is in full swing here with two awake and wondering about breakfast. Hope you have a wonderful Monday!
3 comments:
If you watch my kid tomorrow I will come over and personally clean out your fridge and then we can take all of them to the laundry mat . They can keep each other occupied and we can wash MOUNTAINS of laundry together. I too want to whine today as I am feeling overwhelmed.
My best advice to you for sleep. LAY OFF the caffiene. I am serious it will help your sleep be a lot better. It's hard to do. I get headaches if I have been drinking alot and stop but it DOES help.
Think positive. only 26 more days to go till the Air Show is OVER for the year.
I, too, am having a craptastic day. I have a better idea for tomorrow -- let's hire one of the little old ladies from church to watch all of the kids, do our laundry, and clean out Mynde's fridge. We'll go pick out paint then head to a spa. Any takers?
Hey, Rhonda -- I'm one of those 'little old ladies' and let me make you aware that 'little old ladies' have had a chance to get used to the 'good life(the one you guys haven't experienced yet but only dream about -- the one filled with peace and quiet and downtime' and there is some sort of shock to the entire system when thrown back into the chaos called family-raising!!
Soooo, let me whine about MY day yesterday....originally geared to stay at Mynde's for 4-5 hours like always (where, I USUALLY dry & fold the laundry and at least get washed whosever dirty laundry stack is the highest) and TRY to get morning work done for her so that when she gets home it is in order and not destroyed-looking when she walks in the door (that is very discouraging, to go to work and come into a mess at home....been there, done that) -- I got the call that it was going to take a trip to the hospital operating room and would take all day and here's the part I whine about -- yesterday I was whiny and grumpy too and the kids' antennas picked up on that immediately & they decided they just wouldn't listen to Grandma and away they went!!! I guess everyone's stars fell yesterday -- for my poor Mynde heard the despair in my voice as I told her not to worry that I would stay however long I needed to (even tho, to be honest, yesterday I would've rather eaten worms -- sighhhh sorry my baby child)...then that old guilt kicked in with me -- after all, what's WRONG with me that I am not sweetness and light all the time and especially that I knew my daughter could hear that in my voice. BUT, THIS TOO PASSED AND I MADE IT!!!!! And the kids became good for me(I Won!!) and we made mud pies, played in the pool, had water fights(literally), filled the bird feeder and played out in the driveway. Sam quit saying 'I Hate You Grandma' and so perhaps yesterday just for that one day, God -- being the Gracious Loving Spirit that He is, will erase the guilt from Mynde & me -- my despair -- the kids' new awful perspective of Grandma(who was grouchy early on) and leave this day as the day poor Ali had to endure all that pain and we got thru it.
It also didn't help that I didn't have my cigarettes with me -- 10 hours without AGHHHHHH!!......I made a mental note to leave a pack hidden at Mynde's 'just in case for the next time'.
So there -- whining time is over .... it felt good!! Thanks Guys!!
Sharon
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