11 things I discovered while trying to get ready for vacation

1. Shopping for a swimsuit is not a party.  Luckily the heavens smiled down on me and I found one- in my size at the first store I went to- 50% OFF! 
2. The muffler to the lawnmower is in the master bathroom.  Right next to the toothbrushes on the countertop.  I have no idea why.
3.  The bag of 300 solo cups to return to my sister in law is still in my dining room.  I have seen her twice in the past month- neither time did I take her the cups.  If I put them away, I will never remember.  So instead, we are embracing them as part of the decor.
4.  I should clean out the back of the recliner more often (I'm not going into detail here).
5. Holy heck wow it's been a LONG time since I had all of our laundry done all at the same time.  Which I still don't, because every time I put in 'the last' of the dirty clothes- the kids baskets magically fill with more?  How is this possible?
6. There is an absolutely obscene amount of toothpaste on the hall bath shower curtain.  I can only imagine someone has been using it as a hand towel.  In the crazy mix of trying to get ready to leave, I am now washing shower curtains.  Because clearly with a to do list a mile long, I should wash shower curtains too.
7. It would have been easier to have the entire van reupholstered than to clean out the mess that I just cleaned out.
8. Suitcases are impracticle.  Is packing in plastic tubs too suburban white trash?
9. Making a 'to do' list is fruitless- because I keep adding more to it than I am scratching off.
10.  I am out of glass cleaner.  So although there will be no toothpaste left on our bathroom linens, the mirrors may just have to stay the way they are.
11.  Children are of no help. At all.  They just wander around, wondering what's for lunch, if so and so can come over and asking how much longer until you are done and we can play legos.  They don't understand that I will NEVER be done.  But eventually I will surrender, put our rubbermaid suitcases in the car and call it good enough.  And we probably won't make it out of the state before we have to stop and buy something I forgot.