But I had left something out on the seat, something that was rather private and something my friends probably don't know about me. I mean, I'm sure they have an idea. It's hard to be around someone who does this and not know. It becomes rather obvious after a certain amount of time.
But for her to just see it, out there in the wide open in all it's wholeness. I wasn't prepared.
She opened the door and I heard her gasp. And then I gasped because I realized what I had done. She had seen it, and there was no way around it. I mean, sure I could pretend like they belonged to someone else. I'm just holding them. I don't know where they came from. You all know the drill.
But no- instead I had to come clean.
Is there a support group for this?
I used to use a lot of coupons, and then I had a lot of kids and there just is no good way to balance children and a coupon organizer while running amok through the grocery store fighting the odds of hunger and poop- both which will emerge from said children if you are not lightening quick.
But now- I am getting back in the saddle. And this little gem is my newest baby- my addition to our family. Bought and paid for, with a coupon of course ($10 off a $25 purchase- go me!)
So before you judge- just listen to this. This is what makes my heart go pitter pat. This is why I mess with coupons. This weekend at CVS I purchased two boxes of instant oatmeal, 2 packages of starburst gummi's, 4 dove chocolate bars (halloween is coming up-and with a neighborhood of less than 6 trickortreaters we pass out full size candy bars), 2 dawn dish soaps, 2 gallons of milk, 2 tubes of colgate toothpaste and a bottle of method laundry soap. My total was over $30.
I used 2 $2 coupons on the oatmeal, a buy 1 get 1 on the gummis, 4 $.55 on the candybars, 2 $.50 on the dawn, and 2 $1 on the toothpastes. Plus I had a $5 off of $30 plus $6 extra care bucks.
I paid $8.65 for all of that. But here is the kicker. I got back a coupon for $14.99 in extra care bucks good at CVS on my next purchase. I got back more than I paid for- plus I have milk, laundry soap and toothpaste. Not to mention chocolate.
That is why I coupon. Because I coupon, I am then able to buy extra and share with others either in my family or through the food bank. And I hear that the food bank shelves are empty- I even heard that Gleaners is shutting down for a month because they have nothing to give. So if I can stretch my dollars and have lots of extra, then I am okay with that. If I can stretch Dan's dollars that he works so hard for and have plenty for our family (all be it oatmeal which he doesn't really like) then I will do that. Plus I get to go shopping, which I love.
Really- that is probably really why I coupon. Because I am obsessed and I love 'going for the kill' at the check out. And I love how certain cashiers will huff and roll their eyes, like I am really putting them out or something. Not really so much on that part.
So there it is. The truth is out. I am a couponer. I'm sorry you had to find out like this. I don't buy much of anything without one. I pick where we go out for dinner based on one I have. I switch brands on things that don't matter to me based on the best deal I can get. I live for Sunday mornings and a new batch of sale papers and coupons. It's my vice. I even read a ton of coupon blogs. This- by the way- will not become one of those. There are already a ton of them, so just go read one of those. I will continue to keep my focus on young men peeing outdoors and total and complete crazyness that is living with 3 children.
Anywho- I'm looking for a name for my new mambo jambo coupon sorter. I'm thinking a male name, since it is so useful but labor intensive. I was leaning toward Brutus- but that is the name of my father in laws truck and I'm afraid Sam would get all confused. Then I thought Hank- you know kind of rugged and strong, dependable and handsome. Any suggestions?
2 comments:
Weezer. After the Steel Magnolia's nutjob. Because I think that's what this couponing thing is....nuts. Mom did this to me. I was on board with what you said until you mentioned that you choose restaurants based on coupons. Never, in my childhood, did I get to order what I wanted. NEVER. EVER. My order was based on what my dad wanted and my mom's coupons. If we were at Arby's and dad wanted a beef n cheddar and there was a coupon, it was his. If I wanted a beef n cheddar, and the coupon only covered one, tough luck. No beef and cheddar for you. It's like the soup nazi, but worse. Waaaaaay worse. Godspeed with your little couponing self. I wish you well. I will pray for the digestive tracts of your children.
I want to be a couponer. I'm not a couponer. But I like chocolate and saving money....hmmm...
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