I never have really had a hard time doing the hard things. In fact, it is the mundane normal day to day things that seem to wear me out. Just doing the normal life things? That to me is when I drip slowly into a dark place where I don't feel like I can function. But ask me to take on something hard? It's go time.
Why is that? Perhaps it's because God plans to use me for the hard, weird, overwhelming things. And this is how He has built me to cope with that. Like a weird kind of thrill seeking design.
So when God laid on our hearts (more like stomped it in) last summer that we were to get our Fostering license, it seemed like a thing. But how on earth could He use me to Foster a child? Our home is not 'normal', we don't operate on a good solid schedule, I can't keep up most days with what we already have. But we started the process.........ssssssllllloooooowwwwwlllllyyy. After all, what could He possibly use us for. I could never offer care for an additional child.
And then he sent five. FIVE. Through no circumstances that are of their doing, these sweet five sister siblings had to leave their home and go to their grandparents. And then they couldn't stay there anymore.
We were made for this.
We know this family, we have said all along they would be welcome here. But I'm not sure either us thought it could really happen. I mean, who can bring in five extra people into a normal home and still function?
And then it happened. In less than one weeks time, start to finish, we were notified it was a possibility and then they were loaded into cars with all of their things and we were in a convoy headed to home. Our home. Done. Just like that.
Could I possibly handle adding five additional children into my home? Nope.
Could God? Absolutely. We have seen Him show up in every.single.step. There has been an overflowing of food ever since they arrived..........not even joking. Almost every day God is sending someone with lots and lots of food. Yesterday, a box of toilet paper came from Amazon. The day the kids were coming, a friend came in and filled the fridge with fruit and veggies and yogurts and cheese, she put laundry soap in the laundry room, she put paper plates in the cabinet.
The laundry has yet to get overwhelming. Of course I am doing a few loads every day. But even with their initial arrival of garbage bags stuffed full of dirty and clean clothes mixed......it all just got washed. I feel calm. I feel tired. Sure I have moments of frustration, but God is carrying us. I feel like I am serving the Lord........and that is so amazing to be a part of something so big. What a high honor to be a part of something He is doing that is THIS big.
I never want to forget His ways. The ways He has balanced the hectic schedules, has provided the food, has provided the beds..........and the peace that He is giving me. The enemy is among us, mostly attacking through my own children. But my battle is not against my children, it is against the enemy. And in Jesus name, He will not win.