You've GOT to be kidding me

So- we all know what my laundry situation is, right?  I mean I must mention it at least once a week.  It is always on the verge of out of control, it's just where we live.  I struggle to keep up with five individuals clothing, underwear, towels and bedding- there, I said it.

Not to mention that should a drip, a single solitary drip, manage to land on Sam while washing his hands- he must change.  It is not up for debate- he can't handle it.  That usually produces and extra shirt or two in a day.  The child can have dirt all over his entire face- but his shirt will be completely dry and his flip flops dust free.  He hates that too- dusty flip flops.  He washes them in the sink.  And when he does he gets a drip or two of water on his shirt and must change.  See how this works?

Anyway, back to my laundry.  It's out of control and it always will be.  But everyone has clean underwear (usually) and something to wear.  And even if the towels aren't always folded, they are usually clean in a pile somewhere. 

Afterall- I don't have time to focus on laundry with this important blog to maintain- sheesh.

Last night, or technically this morning, at 5:24 am I heard Sam rummaging in his drawers.  Which can only mean one thing.  I went to assist him with changing his bedding and I WILL BE DANGED  if it didn't manage to leak around the wet pads I keep on his bed.  Crap.  I always insist that waterproof mattress pads are worth their weight in chocolate ice cream, until the waterproof back part rips and it begins to rip off every time you wash it.  Then it's worth NOTHING.  I've taken to laying crib mattress pads all over the mattress before I put the pad on- but this time I was not the winner- I was a giant looser.  It had leaked in between them.

I take Sam to my bed, lay him down and listen to him babble for 10 minutes or so before he becomes silent.  Two minutes later- here comes another one of my children (name omitted for sake of embarassing her to death) and she too had peed her bed.  I kid you not it has been YEARS since this one did that.  I just spit out the words "You have got to be kidding me" and hoisted my tired self back from the warm bed and went to her room to begin sheet strippage.  This time though the waterproof pad did its job and I was able to get her all set to go back to sleep. 

Two piles of bedding and wet jammies on my laundry room floor.

I climbed back into my bed just a few minutes before six am.  My alarm begins going off at 6- 4 minutes later.  Back up to begin washing loads of sheets and preparing children for school.

Fast forward to 8:00 am- Sam is tearing up his basket of clean laundry looking for fresh underwear.  Apparently he has now peed MY bed.

That's it.  God must be laughing his head off.  Which makes it okay if I managed to give Him a chuckle.  Otherwise I am on the verge of screaming and throwing in the towel.  You know- the wet dirty one because I haven't had time to wash them either- and it won't happen today because apparently I am going to do 16 loads of bedding.

I was going to blog about Sam knocking my hair iron into the toilet last night.  Somehow that is old news now.

May your morning be bright and your bedding be dry.

If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it.......and I plan to.........

Prepare yourselves for what you are about to read.  You will be forever changed.

I was in Super Target the other day and there- right on the end of the check out lane- was this.......

Be still my heart.  Quisp.  Come to momma.

There was an entire endcap full of cereals from when I was a kid.  Including Alpha Bits- which I was never a fan of.  But Quisp?  Oh......it ranked right up there with King Vitamin. 

I was shrieking I was so happy- so then Sam was shrieking and cuddling the box too.  He didn't know why, but he was.  On the front it says something about a free t-shirt with three boxes and I instantly knew I needed five of them- so 15 boxes went into the cart.

And then I realized that was stupid- but I did buy one.  But I wish I had bought two, because it was absolutely as yummy as it was *cough cough thirty cough cough* years ago.  And even though I hid it in the cabinets my children found it and it is now all gone.

Here it is with my children.  Well, two of them- Emily refused to participate......

Doesn't Ally look thrilled.  No quisp for you my dear.  But Sammy- he had two bowls.

It's like when they brought back the little smurf dolls and tiny smurf mushroom cottages a few years ago.  These marketing companies are smart........and they know who has the cash. 

They are marketing to our children.................... through us.  And in this house, it is working.

Then we stopped at chick fil a and found this.......

This is kind of bitter sweet because I have said over and over and over in my head that they need to put ketchup in tiny trays so that we can skip the whole tear off little metal packages of ketchup and squirt them everywhere thing.  And then you have a pile of ketchup on a freakin paper on the table and it leaks through and voila there is smeary ketchup everywhere.  With tiny little corner triangle metalish ripped off things.  What a mess.  Apparently the ketchup master was speaking to more than just me, because here it is folks. 

A beautiful thing.

And here they are together, with Emilys sneaky little fingers trying to steel them from my photo.

Two fabulous little items that made for a happy momma day.

Sad but true.

I'm thinking of starting a fan club.

Happy Day

Somehow, yesterday at 10:30 am when I was trying to awaken my Emily Sue, I couldn't help but to take pictures of her.  She was out like a light, sleeping so sound that I had a hard time getting her to rouse.

There was lots of family, lots of friends and tons of fun to be had all weekend long. 

And here is the proof- on her dirty little feet.

I am so thankful for a great weekend and all the dirty little feet that made it possible.

Family Photos

Never pass one of these photo booths again without climbing in.  It was more fun than than I can describe.  (Notice how only half of my face is moving- it was root canal day)

I love you family people.

Twins?

So I finally drag my sorry, procrastinating self to the dentist (only he calls himself an endo something or other) yesterday for the dreaded root canal.  Finally.  I scheduled it once earlier in the year, chickened out and cancelled it.  Nothing like getting run over by a train when you have the option to move.  And every time it hurts, I beg for mercy- swear I will get it fixed- cry like a big giant baby, start an antibiotic- and then the next day forget all about it.  It's kind of like buying tires for the car.  It just hurts to spend that much money on something that is working fine- at the moment.  Blow one of those bad boys and all of a sudden it doesn't seem so stupid.

Anywho.

I enter.  Fill out form.  Read brochure about pulp, nerves, abscesses- yuck.  Put that down.  Pick up a People magazine- ahhhhh.  Written in spanish- poop!  Move on to the only other selection of magazine- healthy this, natural that, sporting whatever. 

They call my name.  Nurse asks 3000 questions while banging and tapping.  Breaks out electrocution machine- says to let go of the probe when I feel the tingle.  HOLY COW- I fly up out of the chair, cling to the light on the ceiling and scream.  Tingle my behind.  She moves on down to my 'problem' tooth that I have narrowed down to one of two possible tricksters.  Tests them both- nothing.

Doctor comes in and asks how long I have been experiencing the problem.  I side step around the topic 46 different directions before I admit it has been better than 3 years, as best I can recall, but maybe longer.  He scolds me like a child and says that I new need not one but TWO root canals.  Who? What?

I begin trying to explain that there is not a single way in any universe that I am going to be having two root canals today- while both of his hands, an xray probe, two pointy sharp metal things and a suctioner are in my mouth.  I don't think he heard me.

Office girl sticks her head in and drops a big old bomb "Insurance caps out at $1000 annually" and runs like a soldier throwing a grenade.  In my head, I am doing the math.  One root canal=$980.  My portion=20%.  Less sales tax, minus gauze pads, plus parking validation.  What does this mean?  "You'll owe $800 for today's procedures" she screams back from under her desk.

No joke.  Tears began streaming down my cheeks.  Partly from the fear of TWO ROOT CANALS, the needle sticks that are happening all over my mouth- including on the roof, and mostly from my pissed offedness from spending that much money on something so stupid.

The doctor asks what I am afraid of.  I may have been begging for gas at the time.  "Sphending fat much money on thomething so thupid".  Duh.

I am given a half hour to lay back and process the information, and the anesthetic.  I eventually come to the conclusion that I need to proceed with both, get them over, fork over mountains of cash and put it all behind me.  Whatever, right?

Drilling. Poking.  Dust. X-rays. Tubey things. Springs up in my teeth.  A balloon snapped over my head with a hole poked just for my tooth to stick out.  Trying to breath through my nose with my mouth open wider than it is really capable of going. Drowning in my own saliva.  More poking.  Done.

My entire head was numb from the middle over- neck up to my eyes.  Even that little flappy thing in the back of my throat was numb and causing me to suffocate.  I was an attractive mess.

I now get to go for permanent fillings next week- which will involve more Novocaine I'm sure- and then I'm off to get two crowns (valued at $1000 EACH).  I should be able to drive something that costs this much money. 

Have I mentioned how much I hate the dentist.  At least if I had dentures I could just mail them in for their procedures.

Practice makes perfect...............................or so they say

It is almost 9:00 at night.  Allyson is on the back deck practicing her saxaphone.

Sam is doing what the neighbors are doing- taping his ears shut.

We may have to have her start practicing in the neighbors yard.  Could she have picked a louder instrument?

4 more minutes until it is bedtime and I can put these kids away to sleep.  I will then pop some kind of massive pain killer and hope that this pain in my teeth will subside.  Today was my root canal day.  Not the kind of exciting day you would think- what with such a catchy name and all.

Goodbye Summer

August is over.  Apparently it is now September.

Don't get me wrong.  I am a sucka for the Fall.  It is my absolute favorite time of the year.  But could it really be upon us already?  Is that possible?  WHERE on earth could this year possibly be going in such an all fired hurry?

And why oh why is Sam awake at 6:45 in the morning?

Nothing good can come of this.  He's already begging to go to the neighbors house and demanding chocolate milk.  Just wait until he realizes I am in fact slapping in an excercise tape and taking over the living room for the next 30 minutes. 

Today involves preschool, work, grocery store (if all goes well), a fresh and delicious made from scratch dinner (ahhhh I crack myself up) and a girl scout meeting.  Dan is working nights this week. Our laundry is quickly approaching 'red alert' status.  And I'm having a root canal tomorrow.  With any luck Emily will declare- at 9pm tonight as well- that she in fact never did do her homework again and we'll be up until 9:30 with a cranky momma complaining and griping.

It's a charmed life we live here.

Yeah- these don't really have anything to do with anything.  Just air conditioner condensation dripping off a charm.  Poetic, isn't it?